Sunday, September 30, 2007

he spoke

do you ever go through times where you don't really hear from God? i hate those times. it can be confusing trying to figure out why those lulls linger. is it unconfessed sin in my life? or am i just not stopping long enough to hear what he has to say?

i think somewhere in my warped mind i picture God waiting for me, and when i say "go", he will start speaking. like it all hinges on me.

yeah, scary - i know...but that's how nuts i can be.

i recently went through such a time. it was frustrating enough to feel forsaken by God, but the timing couldn't have been worse. i was facing the beginning of a new ministry, and was going through a number of personal struggles.

what could i do? believe me, i tried everything - from pitching a fit, to talking to others about God and his neglect of me, to using the silent treatment to force him to speak.

how silly i am, when faced with this plight!

i finally gave up and simply figured i'd take him at his word, and wait.

two days ago the answer came. like waters breaking through a dam, like the mighty rushing wind, there was no mistaking his voice.

have i mentioned that there is nothing like it?
so if you find yourself staring into space, wondering if he ever will speak, keep waiting. the answer will come, just not when you want it and not how you want it.
after all, you're not God.
He is.

breaking bad habits

bad habits are hard to break.
you know what i'm talking about.

some people overspend, others overeat. and yet others over exercise. i wish that were me!
some people gossip, others get angry, and then there are some that just can't agree.
for some it's what they do, for others it's what they think, and for many it's still what they see.

you know what i'm talking about. some habits are just hard to break.

it's not for not wanting to change. but time and again, some people try hard, others try harder, and yet on their faces they keep falling.

the answer is easy, but so hard to do. one step at a time, one day at a time.
Christ gives the strength, and change you He will.
you must never give up.
he helps you again and again.

Monday, September 24, 2007

silence

what's so hard about being silent?

i think about my life.
mistreated. misjudged. misunderstood.
unappreciated. unrecognized. sometimes underestimated.
and i am quick to speak. quick to fight for my honor, my dignity, my self.

then i think about His life.
mistreated. misjudged. misunderstood.
unappreciated. unrecognized. often unwelcome.
and i am quick to see. not a word spoken. absolute silence.

what's so hard about being silent?

© labujamra

Friday, September 21, 2007

new beginnings

i love all things new. i remember buying my first new car. how clean it smelled. i also remember with fondness the look of my first new apartment, the paint still a crispy white and the furniture untouched. i remember opening the fridge that still had no trace of use.

oh, and i love new clothes, how they hang in the closet, without a wrinkle. i love finding new restaurants, or a new road to work, a shortcut perhaps. and of course i love a new friend, the beginning of a new relationship and all it has to offer.

i love that God is about new beginnings. yesterday was the first day of the bible study "power at work". new people coming together for a new year of bible study with much promise and enthusiasm. new curricula given out to women hungry to delve into God's word for new wisdom. an opportunity to turn a new page and start fresh with God, examining goals for the year and setting new priorities.

i love it.

it reminds me of God's mercies, new every morning.
his forgiveness, poured out again and again, giving us a chance to start all over again, no matter how "dumb" we've been.
his grace, newly felt after stumbling down the wrong path for the umpteenth time.
his love, enveloping us afresh, allowing us to extend ourselves once more to that person who hurt us regardless of deservedness.

new life. new hope. new opportunities.
revel in that thought, why don't you, and resolve to make a new beginning today.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

great poem

I loved this. Hope you enjoy it too. I'm not sure who the author is.

"I walked a mile with pleasure,
she chattered all the way;
But left me none the wiser
for all she had to say.

I walked a mile with sorrow,
and ne'er a word said she;
But oh, the things I learned from her
when sorrow walked with me."

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

forgiveness

the longer i'm a Christian, the harder it is to ask God's forgiveness for my sinful actions.

when i was a young Christian, it was easy. half the time i didn't know that i was doing wrong, and i felt that God was still in the process of teaching me new things. there were habits that needed to be broken, sinful ways to be made right. there were things i just didn't know.

a bit later on, when i had grown up a bit, i started noticing that i would still sin in areas that i knew were wrong. but i figured God knew that i needed reinforcement. so i would try to impress him with the quality of my plea for forgiveness. i would also count the days i would go before sinning in that area again. the longer the time between sinful episodes, the better i felt about myself.

lately, though, i am what you would consider a fully grown Christian. i can feed myself, dress myself, and am even showing others how to do those things. and this is where things have gotten hairy. because all of a sudden, asking God to forgive me for things i know i shouldn't have done sounds trite and insincere.

do you ever feel that way? the funny thing is that even as i'm typing those words, i realize the silliness of my self made, performance based, 'i can impress God with my actions' theology!

God is love. His steadfast love endures forever. His mercy is everlasting. There is no end to His patience. There is no limit to His faithfulness. That's who He is.

but, but, but - wait a second....how can it be so easy, you're wondering?

that's the thing. it isn't. it wasn't. it cost God EVERYTHING for us to have that privilege.

it cost God his Son.

do you get it?
God forgives.
so just ask him already!
no matter how "old" you are...

Sunday, September 16, 2007

hello everyone. i'm still here. sorry i haven't blogged in a while. but i find it's tougher keeping up a blog than i had anticipated. all of a sudden i'm worrying about new things in my life - like is the blog interesting...is anyone really reading it....how many days should i wait between blogs....should i just write something really deep once a week, or should i overload the blog with daily nonsense.

as if i didn't have enough things to worry about already!

well, i don't have that much to say today. it was one of those great days with great weather, a great sermon at church, great time with friends at lunch. i had a great haircut, then spent a great evening with my sister's family and the day is not even over yet.

ugh. i'm going to be sick. did anyone say great!!

anyway, here's what i've decided. look for a new blog every couple of days. i'm planning on mixing it up. some blogs will be useless like this one, others will include my deep (though still useless!) thoughts. your comments are welcome.

meanwhile, have a great week at work.
because here's a thought: your day can be great, even at work!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

what a day

i had one of those days today that i'd rather erase from my memory - my boss and i had it out. and although most of what he said was unfair, there was about 2% of truth to his words.

2% of truth that hurts!

here i was functioning under the impression that i was the best thing that's ever happened to my work, secretly thinking that they were just lucky to have me!!

but apparently, i'm not perfect... who knew??

have you ever been there? all of a sudden, one of your itsy bitsy flaws is magnified for everyone to see. ouch!

what do you do when you are put in that painful place?

of course i got angry, i felt victimized, then i had bad thoughts about my boss. and i confess i was even close to tears driving home....but as i finally got my prayer hat on, and started thinking about what Jesus would do, i realized that there was only one solution for me.

say no to self. humble self. take responsibility for my actions. confess. repent. change.

words that hurt. but words a christian cannot ignore.

i think i'm already on the road to change, but i have a feeling it's gonna be a bumpy road ahead.

believe me, i may even need a supernatural force to help me out!

oh, but here's the thing: i already have that supernatural force in me.
his name is Jesus.

Sunday, September 9, 2007

passion

As I look out my window I see the path that leads to a stadium. There is a soccer game this afternoon, and I have never in my entire life seen so many people rushing to one place with a single goal in mind: cheering their favorite team on to victory.

Passion for something is an interesting concept. You can be passionate about a sports team, an activity, a particular gadget.

Still - misplaced passion - as passionate as it sounds - means absolutely nothing. The point isn't the passion itself, but the object of one's passion.

We live in a time where ideology is rampant. Most of the people I work with are pretty passionate about things like global warming and recycling. I suppose to work in the crazy ER environment, one also has to be passionate about helping the poor and social equality.

And then there's religion. Who hasn't heard of great acts of philanthropy and sacrifice in the name of a church or a particular faith? Passion continues to lead many young men and women to give their lives in the name of their false god.

But again: misplaced passion means absolutely nothing!

One day, we will see hoards of people marching on - not to a soccer game - but to face Jesus Christ - sitting on His throne. Refusing to believe that notion does nothing to change the reality of it. It will happen.

Will you recognize him when you walk into that stadium?

Believe me - if you know Jesus - well, that's something to cheer passionately about - at home or at work!! Don't wait until eternity to electrify your world with that knowledge. Reach out in love to those around you with that truth. It could change their life.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

my first blog

It's a lot of pressure trying to figure out what to say on this first blog!! I know, I know, only 2 people are actually going to read it, but those 2 people could end up being my mother and Oprah Winfrey!!

Power at work.

I want it. I want to be able to face my boss and respond in love. I want to reach out in kindness to that really really mean person in the cubicle next door. I want to turn the other cheek, be willing to give up the seat up front, and, yes, pick up that towel to wash those feet.

It sounds lofty. And maybe it is. But that's the thing about Bible Study. God has a way of showing up during Bible Study. And what seems impossible all of a sudden becomes natural.

Power at work. It is possible.

Why don't you give it a try this year?

Come to Harvest Bible Chapel in Rolling Meadows Illinois on Thursday night at 7pm. I'm teaching the class called power at work: biblical principles for the working women. We're studying the book of genesis. It's gonna be great.

You can also check out my website poweratwork.org for more detals about the class!